Anticipated New Beginning With Expectation

 

Lord, is it possible to have a new beginning with You again? Could You forgive me about last nights ice cream? Oh, and the cookies, chips, nuts, and granola bar too. Please forgive me for last night’s binge. And, thank you the scales didn’t go up this morning. That’s a sure miracle. Your mercy amazes me, especially with all my mess-ups. and backsliding.

My friend has been fasting in prayer for her brother who’s sick. She’s lost noticeable weight and looks good too. Yes, I do want to lose more weight, but I also want to maintain the fullness of Your Presence. I want to feel victorious so I can pray without feeling ashamed due to my own sins of gluttony. It’s my desire to make You proud as I eat in submission to Your will. You know what’s best for my body and I trust You. I just have a weakness resisting pleasure food. Help me, allow me to start over again with You.

Child, I’m the God of many second chances. I died so that you (and others too) could be cleansed and delivered from ALL sins. I died so that you could enter into the Almighty Presence of God. None is worthy. No, not one. It’s only because of the price I paid, the shedding of My blood as a sacrifice – the price I gave freely so that you and others could enter in My Presence. 

Lord, how can I make You proud?

Love Me, seek Me, and trust Me. Listen and obey, for there is no other way. There’s much truth in that child’s song. Let the little children lead you. Behold, how easily they trust and love. You should do the same. Follow their example. There’s much truth in the saying, “The little children shall lead them.”

Okay Lord, I’ll try. But I need Your guidance. How do You want me to eat so I can be a testimony of Your forgiveness and Your delivering power?  Others who are struggling need to know You can deliver them, especially when what they need is deliverance from their own selves? That’s what causes most of all my problems- self, myself.

Lord, do You want me to eat only two meals a day or just three meals a day, give up all desserts, or just give all my favorite pleasure foods? Do I wait until I am physically hungry to eat? Do I only eat half portions? Should I get hungry and stay hungry?

Yesterday I started out with intentions to eating only two meals. Then I got real hungry and ate past full. Later last night, I rationalized that ice cream could be my third meal. Well, we both know where that led to – another binge. I should have drank something instead.

Now I’m at another bottom with my weight. This is the biggest I’ve since 2014. I want my size 10 pants back. Where do You want me with my eating and my weight? Help me obey You and eat what is good for this body You gave me. I want to become stronger, both physically and spiritually, mentally too.

Child, as You seek My will for your eating, some days you’ll be led to eat only two meals, and some days three meals. Occasionally, I may lead you to eat no meals. Each day will be a new beginning. These new beginnings won’t be the same as a new beginning after a binge, but a new day of learning to trust Me and walking in My will.

I want you to learn how to trust, listen, and then obey as I lead you. With each new day as you practice these skills, You will grow stronger. Again, your focus is not to follow rules, but instead your focus will be to deny yourself and follow Me. I want you to learn how to deny yourself and become stronger in My Presence. When your self is completely defeated, then your victory is achieved. Self is your enemy. You must learn and become efficient in defeating self.

This watermelon weighs 190 pounds. Thank you Lord, that’s more than me!

Thank you Lord for talking with me and giving me Your instructions yet another time in my struggles with this food addiction. I’m amazed over Your mercy and Your love toward me. You have shown me yet another time of mercy.  This I know, I don’t deserve Your love. I can’t earn it, but I want it. Thank you for loving me. Help me to please You in every way that I am or ever will be.

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                        . . . do not worry about your life, what you will eat nor about the body, what you will put on. Life is more than food and the body is more than clothing. Luke 12:22-23. 

. . . choose life, . . . that you may love the Lord your God, that you may obey His voice, and that you may cling to Him, for He is your life . . . Deuteronomy 30: 19-20

Grace, mercy, and peace will be with you from God the Father and from the Lord Jesus Christ, the Son of the Father, in truth and love. 2 John 1:3 

Screaming At The Scales

Lord, I’m looking at theses scales and they aren’t going down. I know I’ve messed up a lot, but I’m not eating after supper. I don’t understand. Ahhhhh!

Child, you’re looking at what you see, . . numbers on your scales. I want you to look to Me, not what you see.

As you look to Me, you will be rewarded. As you learn, uh . . . relearn surrender and obedience, then you will be rewarded.

Don’t judge your victories by numbers you see on a box. How many times have I told you this before? As you surrender your will in obedience to Me, then you will be victorious.

It goes against all mankind’s logic that surrender and obedience would bring victory, but I am the Almighty. Mankind’s logic is nothing to Me. My knowledge is incomprehensible to humans.

 

Your job is to trust Me. “Trust and obey, for there is no other way” as the little song goes. There is much truth in children’s little songs. I value hearing the children sing to Me. I look on them with My heart full of love and pride just as their parents and grandparents, even more so.

Lord, what do You want me to do?

Trust Me. Hunger for Me and I will feed you.

Lord, show me how, what, when, and where. Direct me so that I please You and make You proud. Lord, I want to eat at Your table.

Child, you will.

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So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal. 2 Corinthians 4:18

But Jesus answered him, saying, “It is written. Man shall not live by bread alone, but by every word of God. Luke 4:4

Do not labor for the food which perishes, but for the food which endured to everlasting life, which the Son of Man will give you, because God the Father has set His seal on Him. John 6:27

And Jesus said to them, “I am the bread of life. He who comes to Me shall never hunger, and he who believes in Me shall never thirst. John 6:35

 

Miracles Still Happen, My Stupidity

Miracles still happen in spite of my stupidity. It’s amazing to me that I can share with you, my accountability partners, I had a weight loss of 4 1/2 pounds this past week. Just know it wasn’t due to my efforts, but because of God’s grace and patience with me. It’s due to His wonderful love and forgiveness.

God has granted me miracles within this weight loss journey. And He’ll grant you miracles in your weight loss journey too. Because God has allowed me to start over a million, trillion times, I know He has a new beginning for you too. After all, He’s no respecter of persons, especially me. It seems I’m the champion of mess ups. Instead of being an example of obedience, I’m the example of what not to do and how not to eat. Yet God never gives up on me. He hasn’t given up on you either.

Yes, there’s been many stupid decisions on my part. As the saying goes, “Stupid is, stupid does.” For those who look at my story for your encouragement, I ask your forgiveness. My story is not one of easy or quick success. No, it’s one of constant setbacks, struggles, and lots of failures on my part. The only victory I can claim is the victory and miracle of Jesus Christ.

For those who look to my food plan as a pattern for healthy eating, I also ask your forgiveness. You’ll be horrified when you read my next post about how much and what I ate. Yet, I still lost weight. It’s an amazing miracle to me. I can only give credit to God’s mercy.

My original weight loss of 90+ pounds (a major miracle in my life) was not due to what is considered by experts to be a healthy diet plan. No, instead it was due to portion control. God knew after a lifetime of trying to follow assorted diets and failing each one, I needed something I could live with.

Therefore I don’t follow a structured food plan/ diet at all. Don’t look for a diet plan here. Every diet plan I’ve ever tried only resulted in more weight gain when I returned to my normal eating patterns. So God led me to eat in smaller portions. Thereby portion control.

After my gaining back 30 pounds due to stupid decisions on my part, God is now working to teach me to stop and seek His will before I eat.  Really I should seek His will before all things. Also He’s working to increase my trust in Him.  And He’s focusing on helping me learn obedience to Him. Listen, every time I make a decision to obey Him, it’s a miracle. If you really knew me, you would know this is true.

Next post will be about food issues. Yuck!

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Jesus looked hard at them and said, “No chance at all if you think you can pull it off by yourself. Every chance in the world if you trust God to do it.” Matthew 19:26MSG

Being confident of this very thing, that He who has begun a good work in you will complete it until the day of Jesus Christ. Philippians 1:6NKJV

For I, the Lord your God, will hold your right hand, saying to you, “Fear not, I will help you.” Isaiah 41:13NKJV

Inconsistent – Holy 30 Devotional** – Day 23 & 24

Inconsistent, hmmm . . . . My middle name should be “Inconsistent”. Let me explain. First, I’m inconsistent  with my writing. second, I’m inconsistent in keeping my house clean, and finally, I inconsistent with handling my money. You know, keeping the checkbook up to date and paying bills when due. Yes, I’m certainly inconsistent there.

I dream of projects to create a side business, so I spend money collecting all the supplies necessary. Then said projects just sit there for weeks, or months because my interest became focused on other things. This explains why I have a huge collection of lace, material, and crochet dollies. I had dreamed of making vintage aprons and selling them for profit. But one day I’d sew some on an apron, then for several days I’d lay it aside. Inconsistent, I’d say. Yep.

There’s is one thing I do consistently. That’s crying out to the Lord. It seems that I cry out to Him about everything. It’s wonderful how He is always there ready to listen.

But sometimes I don’t listen to His instructions. Uh-oh. Free will, anyone?  I need to listen more, trust more, and obey more. Listen, trust, and obey. Yea, that’s it.

For instance, see those plastic containers. I’d made a Facebook post to give these away for free. Stated that if no one wanted them, in the garbage they would go.

Just yesterday, garbage day, I gathered them up to throw away. But on the way to the garbage can, it came to me, “Just hold them a little longer. Friday is the next garbage day. Wait until then.”

My logic side (Yes, it shows up sometimes, though rarely.) said, “No, I said if no one claimed them, they were going to the garbage.” So I put them in the garbage can and walked back in  the house.

Later in the evening, a lady contacted me saying that her church could use these containers. Oh no . . . , they were already gone. Garbageman already took them. Oh no! How I wished I had listened to God’s Holy Spirit guiding me.

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Lord, I’m so sorry I didn’t follow Your leading. I was so busy completing my plans that I didn’t pay attention to Your guidance. I’m just sick about this. A church could have used these. Please forgive me and help me to listen. Open my ears to her Your voice and pay attention. Then help me to obey Your leading.

And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God. Romans 12:2 

 

Trust in the Lord with all your heart, And lean not on your own understanding; In all your ways acknowledge Him, And He shall direct your paths. Proverbs 3:5-6 

      Have I not commanded you? Be strong and of good courage; do not be afraid, nor be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go. Joshua 1:9 

 

Trust in Him at all times, you people; Pour out your heart before Him; God is a refuge for us. Selah Psalm 62:8
And again: “I will put My trust in Him.” And again: “Here am I and the children whom God has given Me. Hebrews 2:13

Trust in Him at all times, you people; Pour out your heart before Him; God is a refuge for us. Selah Psalm 62:8

For the word of the Lord is right, And all His work is done in truth. He loves righteousness and justice; The earth is full of the goodness of the Lord.               Psalm 33:4-5 NKJV

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**The short devotional, “Holy 30” (See picture of Day 19 & Day 20) is based on I Peter 1:16. First Baptist of Tillman’s Corner published this devotional. I didn’t write any of it, but I do have permission to share it with you.

If you would like some additional information about our church check out this website:    http://www.fbtc.org/ . You can also listen to some sermons from our pastors. Enjoy them, I do.

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Below are two books I love. They emphasize listening to God’s voice. They help me during those times when I’m crying out.

You can find both books on amazon.com. No, I’m not an affiliate for Amazon.com. I keep telling myself I’m going to, just never do. Guess that’s something else I’m inconsistent with or could that just be an old fashioned case of procrastination? Sigh

Listen More, Eat Less

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Lord, You said for me to listen more. I want to hear You. Do I fast today in order to hear You? I’m not hungry now, but last night at supper I had to fight the urge to eat more and more.

 

My child, just eat less today. Judge how much you eat by your hunger. Eat less, listen more. Continue reading Listen More, Eat Less

Believe He Will

Several years ago I heard one of my granddaughters singing and it ministered to my heart, the chorus of Trust and Obey:

  • Trust and obey
  • for there’s no other way
  • to be happy in Jesus,
  • but to trust and obey.

Easy to say, but sometimes hard to do.

. . . the joy of the Lord is your strength. (Nehemiah 8:10)

Lord, all my life I heard, “You need to lose weight. You need to go on a diet.” Long ago, the doctor wrote on my chart- “Obese.” That word stayed on my medical chart for years. Many people have advised me on how to diet. Some of those I paid money to for their advice. Now people are telling me I’m too skinny. They say, “Stop losing weight.” Even my doctor has now said, “Don’t lose any more.” Then she added, “Well, maybe five more pounds.” Continue reading Believe He Will

BABY JESUS LAYING IN THE – ON THE DRYER?

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Below is a fiction story based on one true fact. In the past, due to overwhelming stress I left Baby Jesus on our dryer for two weeks. I would pat Him every day and say, “Soon, I’ll get to you I promise.” How often do we tell the real Jesus the same thing?

It’s a wonderful thing that due to my excess weight and over eating issues I’ve learned to sit at His feet and seek His advice. Reminds me of a child’s song: “Trust and obey, for there is no other way, trust and obey.”

Thank you Lord for delivering me from 68 pounds.                 BIG ANNOUNCEMENT COMING SOON!

Hope you enjoy the story,  MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL!

________________________________________________________ Continue reading BABY JESUS LAYING IN THE – ON THE DRYER?