Lord, forgive my gluttony last night at supper. I was so tired from helping my parents prepare their house for their out-of-town company. After I got home I just wanted to go to bed, but then I had company of my own coming! I had to prepare our supper and then clean up. I just wanted to lay my head on the kitchen table and go to sleep! My supper consisted of bought fried chicken, mashed potatoes with gravy, corn on the cob, and for dessert “hot apple pie”. Then because I was so very tired and stressed out, I searched the kitchen for more food! I found a Snicker Bar, peanut butter cookies, and a nice piece of Boston Crème pie.
Lord, last night I ate everything, everything I could find! You know this, You saw it all! I hate my failures! It seems like they are always there staring at me! “Not good enough, don’t measure up, no self-control! Failure, failure!” I hear all the taunts of self-accusation! Lord, I am just a “major failure” defeated by a wimpy sin! Where do I go from here? Is there any hope for me? Will I ever get victory? Oh Lord, why do You reach out to me in love and hope at all? I just know I am a disappointment to You! Continue reading I CALL YOU, "VICTORY", MY CHILD!
Right after I woke up, the Lord spoke to me, “Get up, go stand on your scales!”
Okay Lord, is this You or me? This is only Wednesday and I just weighed myself last Monday. Lord, I need to know, is this You?
(Go weigh yourself and you will see that “number”, the one you have wanted to see!) Continue reading REACHED THAT "NUMBER"! (Written Feb. 5, 2014)
Good morning Lord! Thank you Lord for a new day! Lord, I thought I heard You say, “Get up, go weigh yourself.” So I did, but the scales only went down 2 ounces. So Lord, why did You want me to weigh again this morning? Continue reading NEW RULE: ANSWER TO THE PREVIOUS UGLY
Oh Lord, I’m so sorry! I now see the truth in my heart and it is so ugly! I can’t believe that I was so selfish to You! Yes, it was all about the scales! My heart this morning was all about the scales! Oh Lord, I’m so sorry that I hurt Your feelings because I choose the scales over You! I am so ashamed and embarrassed before You now, hanging my head in shame! Lord, I am so sorry, can You possibly forgive me? Continue reading THE UGLY CHOICE!
[Written on December 30, 2013]
Lord, here I am again! Help me Lord! I went on a binge again last night! First, it started with the taco chips at the Mexican restaurant and then I ate all the taco salad including all the crispy shell. Then when I got home I proceeded to the cake, candy, ice cream, and even more snack cakes! Lord, I know better, I can’t believe I have done it again! I had almost made it a whole month without bingeing, I had almost earned a month-long “Recovery chip”. Oh my Lord, why did I do this again? I have lost 37 pounds, but if I keep this up I will just blow back up like a balloon in only one month! Oh why, why did I do this again? Continue reading STARTING OVER IN GOD'S PRESENCE!
(My child, I am the God of second chances!)
Lord, I don’t even know where to start!
(Start with Me, My child!)
Okay Lord, what is first? Continue reading THE GLUTTONY MONSTER! (Writing from the past:)
Lord, help me for I am struggling in this battle! Yes, I am staying obedient to Your eating plan for me, three meals a day, with small portions and nothing in between. But Lord, I still want more and more food! Continue reading ANTICIPATE THE VICTORY!
Lately, the Lord convicted of getting two extra spoonful’s of this or that. I knew in my heart that if I chose to continue eating, it would greatly disappoint My Lord! He has done so much for me that I do not want to disappoint Him! The conviction was so strong to STOP and walk away! Then the Lord led me to pull out some of my “old writings” and I found this from the past. You see, He has talked to me about this before! Yes, He has many times before. Continue reading OBEY THE RED LIGHTS! (WRITING FROM THE PAST)
Thank you Lord for this assurance. I don’t have to worry anymore, I just have to look to You to tell me what and how to do. Thank you for taking the burden of responsibility off me. I know that You know “ALL”, therefore I can trust You to guide me. Oh, what peace in surrender to You, My Lord! Continue reading MY HOPE AND MY VICTORY!